Election results and just say no wristbands and sleepovers (Ep.29)
Sneak peek of Episode 29
Show notes and sneak peek
Episode 29 kicks off with Kori anticipating the fatigue and stress that is hosting sleepovers for little ones. Laura thinks she’s lost her mind, hosting toddlers and preschoolers for a sleepover. Not even caffeine and wine can save you. We all agree that whoever put Halloween, Daylight Savings, and Election Day in the same week clearly hates us.
We spend most of our time debriefing our lack of surprise, but sincere disappointment with the federal election outcomes from our perspectives: Keith as a white man in a red state, Kori as a Black woman in a blue state, and Laura as a white woman in a reddish-purple area of a blue state. We touch on Florida’s constitutional amendments to enshrine abortion rights and legalize marijuana that failed, representation, the importance of protecting transgender kids, how moving to Portugal is tempting, immigration, the perception of the economy, how we recovered and processed our feelings in the wake of the outcomes, the blue bracelet “trend,” how we won’t be storming the capitol, 34 felony charges that seem not to matter because of someone’s whiteness, how our government secrets will be by the toilet in MiraLago, and so much more.
We focus on what’s true before the election that’s also true now - like our care for the vulnerable, love for our families, and showing up to do the work. We mourn how everyone will lose something - even if they don’t realize it yet, and we again flex our compassion muscle to try to understand what motivated folks to vote against their own interests. And we have to then craft a message and a platform that speaks to those needs. So we look ahead to next year’s governor’s race (in Virginia) and congressional midterms (2026) to put together a firewall against this administration - as well as actions we can take in our communities to organize and stand up for folks who will need us.
And Kori shares more about her toddler and preschooler's plans for an epic sleepover. Godspeed, mama.
Follow us on social media (@pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube), drop us a rating and review, and share episodes with your friends!
Resources
Companies buying materials ahead of tariffs from the Wall Street Journal
Instagram reel highlighting irony of IRS not worrying about unaccounted for defense spending, choosing to go after the poor single mom instead.
Transcript
[00:00:00] Laura: Good luck. Let me know how that goes. Yeah, I will. Can you do like a Captain's Log style text message to me?
[00:00:05] Kori: Captain's Log. Hour four. They're getting restless.
[00:00:11] Kori : Yes. Yes. I now have a wine IV drip. Yes. And it is, and it is flowing straight to the back of my throat.
[00:00:19] Laura : Two boys have cried. It's all right. We're all still here.
[00:00:22] Kori : Right. I've cleaned up poop. I've cleaned up urine. I have blown 17
[00:00:30] Laura: noses. We've had two sugar overdoses. Yep. Good luck. Good luck.
[00:00:46] Hi. Hi. Welcome to Pushing Past Polite, where we talk about what matters and make the world more just. I'm Laura. I'm Kori and Keith is here.
[00:00:56] Laura: What a subdued tone. Um, so whoever put Halloween and daylight savings and election day in the same, what week, 10 day span. No, thank you. They don't give a fuck about you.
[00:01:15] No, they clearly don't. I am hungover in every way but alcohol. I didn't even have a single drink and I am hungover as hell.
[00:01:23] Kori : You stupid ass bitch. November? You
[00:01:27] Laura: think you like November? No,
[00:01:29] Kori : you
[00:01:30] Laura: don't. No, no, no. No. Yeah. Way more of a September kind of girl. Do you remember how much better we felt in September?
[00:01:40] Yeah. Yeah. So. Um, we got a lot to talk about today. Let's process some things. The election happened. I can't say I'm surprised. Neither can I. Cory, you called it. My husband said, he goes, damn it, Cory called it. It doesn't mean I wasn't hopeful. It doesn't mean I didn't. I
[00:02:04] Kori : wasn't hopeful.
[00:02:05] Laura: That's right. I volunteered a little.
[00:02:07] I didn't do as much as I normally do, but I know I'm not responsible for saving the world. Um, I. You know donated I voted I did my thing and it didn't happen and and I'm not shocked either
[00:02:25] Yeah, so about that.
[00:02:27] Kori : Yeah. So now we have four years
[00:02:31] Laura: or more I say that in case he just doesn't care about the Constitution and something different changes. So Portugal's real nice. Although, if Russia's gonna take Europe, I mean, like, who knows? Who knows? Who knows, you guys? It's just a wild time. So, you know, the three of us are sitting in different states right now, right?
[00:02:52] One of us is Had a great night though, Maryland. Yes. So, so let's talk about that. Like how this feels. in a solidly blue state in a rural area that was very red of a blue state. Um, and in a red state, but in a blue area of a red state, right? Yeah. It's like, we're the inverse of each other.
[00:03:13] Keith: Yeah. I ended like I was in Florida and I still had one of those like little progressive bubbles.
[00:03:19] So I was more optimistic than I should have been.
[00:03:23] Laura: How are you feeling in light of that?
[00:03:26] Keith: It sucks. Um, I don't know how else to say, it was just such a bummer to wake up. I at least thought we might have a couple of days. But no, this was like decisive. And here in Florida, we had a number of amendments on the ballot that again, some of us were pretty optimistic for, um, it was to safeguard reproductive rights to essentially end the six week abortion ban that currently exists.
[00:03:56] And 57%, the people in Florida versus 43 voted in favor of it. And apparently that's not enough. Because weird thing about Florida a few years ago, they actually passed an amendment that said You need 60% of the vote to pass future amendments. And that amendment didn't even get 60% , but at the time it was enough to pass.
[00:04:19] So
[00:04:21] Laura: how can we raise the bar to make it even harder for people to organize and tell us what they want in the oak or way possible?
[00:04:29] Kori : We are not even going to meet the bar. To raise the bar. Mm-Hmm, . That's right. We are going to meet the current status quo and raise the bar to make it harder for the rest of you.
[00:04:38] To make it harder for the rest of you.
[00:04:40] Keith: Yep.
[00:04:40] Kori : But we are not even going to meet the bar to make the bar.
[00:04:45] Laura: We get ours and screw you. That's kind of how, yeah. Yeah. That's pretty emblematic, isn't it? So reproductive rights of six week abortion ban is still in place right now in Florida.
[00:04:56] Keith: Yeah. As a result. That is just a kick in the nuts, but.
[00:05:02] There was also one for, uh,
[00:05:04] Laura: ovaries and the nuts,
[00:05:06] Keith: yeah,
[00:05:07] Kori : and the ovaries where all
[00:05:08] Laura: the reproduction happens. Yes. The original. Damage. Getcha, getcha there, right?
[00:05:13] Keith: No. I mean, there was just a lot of work that went into it. There were, people were, were working really hard to get that amendment passed. Every event that you went to, people were out there with clipboards, signing petitions.
[00:05:26] It was, no,
[00:05:26] Kori : they,
[00:05:27] Keith: people were really, really trying.
[00:05:29] Kori : Yeah. Yeah. You could tell though. Look at. In any normal situation, it would have passed. They would have been successful. Yeah, that would have been successful.
[00:05:41] Laura: And again, against the backdrop of Florida too, right? 67 percent or 57% Of Floridians when they went overwhelmingly red, right?
[00:05:51] Like again, it's breaking some of that cognitive dissonance and saying like, people really putting, uh, boots on the ground there. That's evident. Yeah. In that differential. And yet.
[00:06:04] Keith: And the, the amendment to legalize weed also failed. I think one of the only amendments that did pass was something about like preserving hunting and fishing rights forever.
[00:06:16] Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Shouldn't be surprised it's Florida, but
[00:06:22] Laura: go get you some gators. Wow. Wow. So that's how it feels in a blue bubble red state. Kori, on the other end?
[00:06:32] Kori : It's like we're all out here representing. We made history with Angela Alsobrook. This is Maryland. Maryland being, uh, now there are two black female senators in the Senate.
[00:06:45] The first time ever.
[00:06:48] Laura: That there's been more than one?
[00:06:49] Kori : That there's been more than one. That there's And one is from Delaware and the other is from Maryland.
[00:06:56] Laura: I see some Mid Atlantic pride there. Yeah. That's pretty cool. So that's
[00:06:59] Kori : pretty cool. And right now, all of our representatives are Black. Our, our governor is Black.
[00:07:07] Our two, we have two congressional representatives that are Black. Our senator is now Black. We have a couple of Black mayors in the building. Like I feel like our state is a representative of our populations, like in terms of how our governance is looking. That's kind of cool.
[00:07:27] Laura: That's a nice, uh, a nice victory or silver lining in the midst of what happened at the top of the ticket.
[00:07:34] Right?
[00:07:35] Kori : Yeah. It's like, I saw this, this picture and it was Angela at the front and then like West that it's like, and it was like this little, you know, she's the leader at this point. Right. Cause she's at the highest level and she's like somebody I see every Sunday at the silver diner. Yeah. Are you serious?
[00:07:54] For real?
[00:07:55] Laura: That's pretty cool.
[00:07:56] Kori : Yeah. Like she's here. This is community. And so I'm, I think she went to the boys school way back when. Oh, wow. Mm hmm. So I like, we, I saw her on Sunday.
[00:08:08] Laura: Very cool. Very, very cool. Yeah. And then I'm in Virginia. In a rural part of Virginia, though, I will say our numbers improved. We moved the needle in terms of, um, You know, uh, how people voted out here, um, that it was more democratic than it usually is, which is great for building for the long haul.
[00:08:31] And yet it's still really sad and hard and disappointing. We really similarly, Keith, we either thought this was going to take several days to figure out or we had hoped it would be resounding in the other direction. And it just wasn't, um, it just wasn't, you know, you keep hearing, I kept hearing stories of, you know, These long lines of women surrounding the building and spouses showing up separately to vote because there was some tension there.
[00:08:55] And I kept thinking, okay, all right. In other words, the wife might vote in a way that the husband didn't want her to, right? Um, which is a whole nother conversation and dynamic. But I just had this, I was like, maybe it could be that resounding. And unfortunately, you know, again, I think we knew it and felt it, that it wasn't going to be, and, um, it was disappointing.
[00:09:16] And then to know, you know, again, the families with transgender children in my community, like, really mourning and being fearful, appropriately so. And, um, and other folks too, but I just see how that played out here, and knowing there are families that are just very afraid and don't feel like they belong.
[00:09:36] are wondering, again, do we go to Portugal or wherever? Um, it's just hard. It's hard to, it's hard. This is really hard. So I just took the day after I took Wednesday. Again, it's a luxury that I had, but I let myself feel a whole lot of feels and then I would just rest and I got back in bed and I would get up and feel a little more and then I would go back to bed.
[00:09:58] I think I ate lunch or breakfast. I think I ate breakfast around two o'clock. Um, but I just needed to recover before I was able to encourage anybody else.
[00:10:07] Kori : Mm hmm. And I was, um, helping friends sober up who were very, very, very, very extraordinarily disappointed. And so I was at brunch talking people off ledges.
I think for me, it was really helpful. I participated in, um, ReCenter Equity is a organization that Natalie Zwerger is the executive director of in Connecticut and they hosted a call and it was like a social justice focused call.
[00:12:24] And I think that having that to ground Tuesday, like the morning of Tuesday, really just helped Even, no matter who was gonna win, like for me, we're funding a genocide. That stays problematic, right? Um, and that is, was gonna be something that we would be fighting against arms embargoes and all those things regardless, right?
[00:12:52] So it's like, part of the conversation was like, what are the things that are gonna be the true for you today and tomorrow? Right, like what are the pieces that you're going to be holding on to no matter what the outcome is. And being able to kind of like ground my day in that kind of thinking and, and writing those things down and thinking about those things and talking about those things helped me to be like less moved by the outcome.
[00:13:23] Because I already thought I, you know, like I already was expecting what happened. Um, but then having that sense of purpose around like, it's, there's, is the sun still going to come up and I'm still going to be fighting for justice. So it didn't matter. It might look a little different. It might look a little different.
[00:13:40] Uh huh. Yes. But it's like, those are things that are still going to be prioritized. My kids are still going to be prioritized. My family is still going to be prioritized. Keeping them safe is going to be a priority, no matter who wins, right? And so I think that kind of foundation really just anchored me to be able to accept it.
[00:14:00] Without as much stirring.
[00:14:03] Laura: Mm
[00:14:03] Laura: hmm. That, that prompt has been helpful for me too. Um, you know, what is true of me today that is still going to be true of me tomorrow. Yeah. Um, I've been thinking about that as well. And I don't, I just wasn't as shocked. Like, I think back to 2016 and how the polls said something.
[00:14:23] You know, surely, surely looking at this juxtaposition, there's no way. Right. And I remember how sick I felt, just sick. And not even knowing how dangerous he would be. I just felt sick that this happened. And I didn't feel that same sense. I certainly am sad. I'm very sad that this is the state of affairs.
[00:14:46] You know, uh, I, I understand the economic factors are really powerful for people. I get that, and I recognize that I live in a bit of a bubble, and that I can afford eggs. You know, if I had to, I could afford baby formula. I could do all of the things I needed to do, I would need to do. And I forget how powerful that is for somebody who can't, right?
[00:15:05] So I'm trying to, I'm trying to give a most generous interpretation to this. Yeah,
[00:15:11] Kori : and, and I, I like to just also think every single election cycle. That there are so many people who are single issue voters who are like not looking at the fullness of what each candidate is bringing to the table, but they are leaning into one element, one aspect, one promise that benefits them or that resonates with them or that will impact them.
[00:15:39] Mm
[00:15:40] Laura: hmm.
[00:15:41] Kori : And that is the direction in which they vote. So like you were saying that, uh, that financial piece for some people was like, that was the thing. Not realizing that the medication that you get through Medicare or Medicaid is now also going to be something that you may have to pay for because he's going to also try to cut benefits.
[00:16:01] And get rid of those benefits. Or your social
[00:16:04] Laura: security check for your parents is now going to be lessened. Yes. But at least you can afford eggs or
[00:16:10] Kori : like whatever the it is. Whatever the thing is, right? And so it's like, I like to think about, that's how I can extend compassion is because it's like that thing is really important to you.
[00:16:22] And secondly, we intentionally do not have a highly educated populace. Say that again. Say that again. And so, we intentionally do not have a highly educated populace. And so, it's easier to encourage them to just hone in on this one thing while I dog and pony these other things. And that is where, that's how I can get your vote.
[00:16:53] Right? So, that's just, And then they feel it later, right? They feel it later, the impact of not noticing all of the rest of the things that were being talked about.
[00:17:09] Keith: Starting to see the stories now where people who work in manufacturing or, you know, in Blue collar industries are starting to understand like what the tariffs really mean.
[00:17:23] So companies are purchasing large quantities of materials now before the next administration. And because of that, like people are losing bonuses.
[00:17:34] Kori : Yep. I saw that too.
[00:17:36] Keith: It's slowly going to start dawning on people that they weren't told the truth. That a lot of the promises and. The policies that he hinted at or described are just not going to come like I guarantee you the one thing that he will do is spend 300 billion dollars deporting as many people as he can.
[00:17:59] That's, that's what he's going to do. He's going to deport people. Which then
[00:18:03] Laura: causes labor shortages, which then causes price increases, which Which
[00:18:08] Kori : people, which companies are already bracing for, for costs, increases, as Keith was saying, increases in materials. So they're already planning to start increasing prices now in preparation for those things so that by the time everything's more expensive, we will already be used to paying more money for those
[00:18:28] Laura: things.
[00:18:30] It's a great example of like, we all lost. We just don't know it yet. Yeah. Not everybody knows it. Right? Not only in terms of the economy, and again, assuming he carries through on tariffs and what he said he was going to do, it will have a negative impact, right? The only way for prices to go back to where they were would be a depression, and that's not something that would be good for everybody.
[00:18:48] In terms of democracy, we've lost, and we just don't even know yet. Like, there's just so many ways in which the celebration on the other side just rings really hollow, and the thing that really pisses me off is this whole, like, You know, we just need to get along now, we just need to get along, and like you all, it says so much about your character, if you, if you make friendships based on how people vote, of course it's coming off from that side of things, and I'm like, that's a privilege to be able to say, you know, just be friends with everybody, when a lot of people's safety are jeopardized by what you just did.
[00:19:20] It's not safe. Yeah, like people's real lives are impacted by your vote. Yeah, but we're the sore losers who just need to get along and it's like, listen, we're not challenging the outcome of the election. We're not storming the Capitol. Like none of that's
[00:19:33] Keith: you guys wanted to, you guys want to try and storm the Capitol?
[00:19:35] I'm busy in January.
[00:19:36] Laura: Sorry.
[00:19:37] Keith: Oh, dang it.
[00:19:38] Laura: No, like, you know, it's just, the, the, it's wild. I had someone who I'm not close with who's just an acquaintance really. Send me a video of staffers, supposedly, who even knew who these people were, who were, you know, Trump staffers who were having a worship session after he won.
[00:19:56] And she was sending this to me like, I assume the message was like, look, see, it's a good thing. Or like, look, see, God wanted this to happen. And I wrote back, I was like, why did you even send this to me? This turns me off so much more from you. It makes it so much grosser. It's gross. It's gross. Ugh. I know.
[00:20:16] Kori : Yeah. Yeah. So. There's a lot. Also, I, I am also interested in, or not interested, but kind of like, I feel like it's a funny thing that now people are like, we have to coalition build and we have to do all these things.
[00:20:32] Laura: Well, didn't we just talk last week about how, uh, not all white people, particularly white women, we were describing were safe for black people.
[00:20:41] Did wristband
[00:20:43] Kori : trend? Yes.
[00:20:44] Laura: Yes. Yes. This idea of, like, indicating that you're a safe person by wearing this,
[00:20:50] Keith: like, Wait, really?
[00:20:52] Laura: Yeah, just be a, be a not, don't be a shitty person. If you don't have relationships now, you think people are going to want to trust you now? Okay, so the,
[00:21:01] Kori : basically the wristband thing is like, wearing this blue wristband, It's like a don't blame me, I bloated blue.
[00:21:07] Like, yeah, for, it's, it's really for white people to be like, Hey, I, I voted for everybody. See, I'm safe. I have this wristband. Okay,
[00:21:18] Keith: good. And I guarantee you a lot of people wearing them probably didn't even vote. If you look at the numbers, it's not like Trump brought a whole bunch of new people to the polls.
[00:21:29] I think he actually had a lower vote count. It's quote unquote, Democrats, progressives, whatever. It just didn't show up. Who sat it out.
[00:21:37] Laura: That actually, while it's frustrating, it also gives me a little bit of hope that the numbers didn't move a whole lot from 2020 because if this was all of a sudden like a new, we've turned the page and everybody thinks like this.
[00:21:52] It's easy to think, to think that based on the popular vote, all of that, the percentages. But when you look at raw numbers, a lot of this was people setting it out.
[00:22:03] Kori : Yeah. I mean, but can we like acknowledge the fact that the Democrat platform was like, we're better than the other guy. That was like their platform.
[00:22:13] And so And, and let's tinker around the
[00:22:16] Laura: edges with the system we have.
[00:22:18] Kori : Versus Yeah, or, or not even. Let's just kind of like keep rolling on this, uh, on this path. Yeah. Like It was like a status quo bus just like flying in and out of all the cities across the country and there was nothing inspirational, right?
[00:22:38] It's like Because you're walking out to Beyonce and J Lo is speaking at your thing, is that supposed to make me want to vote for you? I don't understand. Like, where, what about you makes me more hopeful when our data still indicate that Black people are more likely to get stopped in frisks, that cop cities are still being built under your watch, that you all, when you were in the Senate, when you were a vice president, you all didn't codify Roe v.
[00:23:04] Wade. When you're funding a genocide, when, like, what are the things that you're trying to tell me are gonna be the things that make me say, you know what, you're, you're my choice, like, you're my choice, as opposed to being like, ooh, I'm gonna choose you over that guy.
[00:23:23] Keith: I agree. I think that they were really relying on that same Trump backlash vote that they got in 2020.
[00:23:30] And I, one of the things that really upset me was I've been screaming for a while now that like this whole idea of quote unquote inflation is kind of just marketing and cover for if you look at it a lot of Oil companies, retailers, even like these massive agricultural corporations have been earning record profits for years, just record profits.
[00:23:55] They just use the pandemic as cover to like jack up all their prices. And because there's been so much consolidation, there's not a lot of competition. So you don't really have a choice if, you know, they're going to charge what they charge and you have to pay it at the grocery store. Anyway, I've, I've been saying this for years now that we should be doing something about it, like actually tackling the issue and making it clear to voters that this is what's driving those costs.
[00:24:21] But they didn't, they didn't do anything for years. And then all of a sudden, in the last like three months, the Harris campaign starts talking about, Oh, we're going to go after the corporations who have been, and it's like, how is this a campaign issue? You've been, you should have been doing this. Years ago, and if they had been, people might have looked at the, the economic situation.
[00:24:42] That's a little bit differently. That's right. Yeah. They wouldn't have thought that it was due to federal policy that here's your enemy and we're gonna try to fight it. But that really bothered me. Mm-Hmm. didn't do anything about it for years and then started talking about it two months, three months before the,
[00:24:57] Kori : but that's how I also feel about the women's reproductive health issue as a, as a campaign platform.
[00:25:04] You've had plenty of time to do something about this. And you didn't, and now it's actually not even in your control in the position of the president. Like, what are you talking about? So what, what is your long term, what is your long game strategy to be able to peel back what happened? You're like, well, how are you going to do that?
[00:25:26] Are you planning to sign an executive order? As soon as, like, what is the plan? Because it's not even in your wheelhouse anymore. It was. When you were a senator and when you were the vice president it was so it felt empty It's there are so many things about it that kind of felt empty and then felt like last ditch effort kind of things like, ooh We have this like little book of things that we don't want to say, but might engage the population, our base.
[00:25:58] Laura: Throw these out. Let me sprinkle that with the war needs to end the last week. Yeah.
[00:26:02] Kori : Yeah. Yeah.
[00:26:08] Laura: What the hell?
[00:26:10] Keith: I think one silver lining though is like now because of Congress and the Senate, there's no more blame game. This time, right? Now y'all govern. Do it. At least, like, a year from now when, if anything, your prices have gone up because of the tariffs and everything, you're not going to be able to point at somebody and say, Oh, it's inflation.
[00:26:30] It's their fault. Like now,
[00:26:32] Kori : Yeah.
[00:26:33] Keith: As bad as things get, there's no way to spin it. So I guess that's kind of a
[00:26:39] Laura: And maybe, and people pay more attention, right? We're all, we're going to have to engage more. You know, I will tell you, it was really nice to not feel like I had to tune into the news every day under Biden.
[00:26:49] Like, I feel like there was a, you know, mind you a very old adult, but at least early on, like a steady, calm presence. I'm not happy with everything he did very clearly. But like I didn't feel like I did under Trump. I just was constantly like whiplash. Yeah, what's the what's the new what's the new tragedy today?
[00:27:08] What is the new thing just
[00:27:09] Kori : like can we just also just be like he is the embodiment of all of whiteness and Privilege and all of it that lives and exists in this country because this guy has 34 felonies and But has never been to sentencing. Why? So he can run for fucking president! And how
[00:27:32] Laura: many children from how many different women?
[00:27:34] But we would feel very differently if he were a person of color. Yes! All of the things.
[00:27:39] Kori : Like all of the things. Failed businesses, bankruptcy. This is a rapist telling women that he's gonna be protecting them. Whether you like it or not. Or whether you like it or not. Like, what are people thinking about?
[00:27:53] Those kinds of, like, creepy ass uncle moments that are constant in his engagement really make me concerned about women who vote for him. And what their lived experience has been, because if you think that those kinds of behaviors are acceptable and normal, then that's extremely fucking troubling.
[00:28:19] Like, the rapist is going to tell you he's going to protect you whether you want to like it or not,
[00:28:26] Laura: and
[00:28:27] Kori : he has your vote?
[00:28:29] Laura: Yes!
[00:28:33] Kori : Unless you're getting assaulted regularly. Right? Like, and that's part of your experience of like normalcy somewhere in your lived experience. That was like a thing. You know, I just, that part, the felony piece, like if he was black, he would be in jail like Diddy's in jail. He would be in jail. He would have been sentenced.
[00:28:58] He'd be serving his hundred thousand years of concurrent sentences.
[00:29:04] Laura: Who's, who's mayor of New York? Black guy who was, who's already like disgraced. Eric.
[00:29:10] Kori : What is his last name? We
[00:29:11] Laura: just talked about him. We did. Eric. That's right, whatever, that guy.
[00:29:14] Kori : Yeah.
[00:29:16] Laura: Mayor, person of color, done, disgraced, versus this guy just keeps rising.
[00:29:21] Kori : Like, it's so Like the embodiment of failing up, like just the complete
[00:29:28] Laura: white mediocrity,
[00:29:29] Kori : white mediocrity just falling forward and forward. And now this dude is going to have all the security clearance again, like to put
[00:29:40] Laura: our national security secrets in his bathroom, in
[00:29:43] Kori : his bathroom at the MiraLago.
[00:29:46] It's like regular people out here who are trying to work for the government. If you have too much fucking debt, you can't get clearance.
[00:29:54] Laura: Oh, I got lots of questions. Yeah. Yeah. I've had clearance. But
[00:29:57] Kori : meanwhile, the felon?
[00:29:58] Laura: Oh, and to clarify, much lower clearance than he ever has. Much lower
[00:30:01] Kori : clearance than he will ever have.
[00:30:03] Right. Like, if you have too much debt, if like, you know, you're, you're, you have unhealthy relationships with family members, we need to understand why. Right? There's all kinds of stuff. But this guy,
[00:30:17] Laura: This guy. This guy.
[00:30:23] Kori : Anywho, meanwhile, I'm trying to plan my first sleepover for four, three and four year olds. Good luck. You need to
[00:30:30] Laura: have lots and lots of freaking caffeine. Lots of caffeine, lots of activities and a mandatory bedtime. Let me tell you right now. And no coffee after, no coffee, no sugar after like six o'clock.
[00:30:41] Kori: Oh my gosh. I shit you
[00:30:42] Laura: not. You're about to learn that sleepovers when we were kids were big fun, sleepovers as parents, not so fun.
[00:30:47] Kori : Yeah, so I already had like the conference call, the mom conference call, and I was like, so I just want to put out there, I know we're talking about a sleepover, but are they, is anybody actually gonna sleep over?
[00:30:57] Or are they
[00:30:58] Laura: all gonna call mommy at eight o'clock and go, I miss you, can you come get me?
[00:31:01] Kori : Yes, yes. I vote for that. I said like, you know, let's just keep that in mind as a, as a significant possibility. Y'all don't go out on date
[00:31:11] Laura: nights because you might need to come get your boy.
[00:31:13] Kori : No, but one of them is going to go out on a date night because it's their wedding anniversary.
[00:31:17] And I was like, okay, he'll be good with us for a few hours for sure. But be done by eight. Yeah, he can come and play and whatever. But like, let's have a time, a check in time. Yeah. And see how everybody's feeling when it's like downtime, getting toward bed. And see how people are feeling. So
[00:31:35] Laura: what's the occasion?
[00:31:36] Is this just the boys want to do this? This isn't birthday yet.
[00:31:39] Kori : No. One of the kids was like, uh, can I come sleep over? And I was like, of course. I was like, can I come today? You're like, no, I need some time. I need to have a conference call. And she was, and she was sick. And the mom, the mom of that child was out of town.
[00:31:59] It's like, no, I
[00:31:59] Laura: can't take you away from grandma right now. You're going to have to go home and see this through.
[00:32:03] Kori : Yes. Like, that's hilarious. G came home and was like, Hey. Um, he wants to have a sleepover, his friend. And I was like, okay, yeah, cool. And so I texted the group and I was like, hey, yeah, that's fine.
[00:32:14] But G hasn't been feeling that well this week. And so I was like, we can't do it this week. Yeah. We need to get him all the way in the woods. Let the germs clear out of here. Let the germs clear out. We need to get all the way through. And so we're, we're talking about doing it, um, on Friday.
[00:32:30] Laura: Speaking of sleepovers, a neighbor of ours right across the way was like, Hey, could you use a full bed?
[00:32:34] Like a really in good shape. I was like, yes, we always can use a bed because I'm sticking it underneath the guest room bed and pulling it out for sleepovers because otherwise we schlep a mattress down the hallway. I was like, Oh yeah, Oh yes,
[00:32:48] Kori : perfect. Come on. sleepover
[00:32:51] Laura: room. This is the sleepover room.
[00:32:53] Here's the bedroom. That's awesome. Yeah. Um, good luck. Have fun. Have, don't let your husband not come home on time, like, make sure you have backup. You need another person. You need another adult. Just to like stay sane. Be like, do you see this craziness? I see this craziness. I might also just
[00:33:08] Kori : like hire a babysitter.
[00:33:10] And just leave? No, like as another set of like, as another adult, how horrible would that be? I could bring, just sleep over and then leave them with their
[00:33:20] Laura: children. And I have no guarantee of how this is going to go. I have no interest in being there. So we
[00:33:25] Kori : can use my house, she said the
[00:33:29] Laura: quiet part out loud.
[00:33:31] I'm out. I'm out. Every time I go to school to volunteer, the kids are like, Oh my gosh. Hi, hi, hi. Can I come over? Can I sleep over? And I'm like, Yeah, we'll have to see. I'm going to need to back myself out of this situation because I have a pretty small list of kids that I know because I mean, if you're coming to my house, you're playing by my rules.
[00:33:49] Kori: Yeah.
[00:33:49] Laura: No, we're not going to do that. Yeah. We're not going to jump on the furniture. We're not going to tackle the dog. Yeah. We're not going to stay up till 2 in the morning. Right. Here's how this is going. Yeah. Are we clear? Yeah. No, you're not keeping a phone up. If your mama wants you to have a phone, that's fine.
[00:34:01] At bedtime, that phone goes downstairs. You're not playing and looking at things at 1 o'clock in the morning. Yeah. Yeah. Is you, can you, can you obey by these rules? Can you, yeah. If you can't, if you can't abide. Sign here with your blood, okay? Sign here. I'm calling your mom at 1 a. m. Come get you ass. I need a blood pact.
[00:34:15] Yes. Yes. We've had some, some sleepovers go beautiful. There's one that she could, she could live here for all I care. Yeah. She could live here. She's pretty, I, yeah. She's one of my extra kids. We joke, we joke the parents and I who claims who on our taxes. Oh, right. Like, fine. That's sweet. But, Just Joe Schmo off the side of the road.
[00:34:31] Let me tell you.
[00:34:32] Kori : Yeah.
[00:34:32] Laura: Yeah. Let me give you a little orientation to Casa de Kassner and how this is going to run.
[00:34:38] Kori : I'm like, also, these kids are like four, three, four, and five. Like, are they really as, you know, I drop my kids off at my brother in law's house, who is like, their blood and family and they love.
[00:34:48] You know, and they're my sister in law and she just cried
[00:34:54] Laura: and cried.
[00:34:55] Kori : I
[00:34:55] Laura: think your boys are talking a big game. I suspect not everybody's going to stay the night. That's
[00:34:59] Kori : why I don't think so either. And so I started that conversation with you today, just to be like, remember that time that you slept over at somebody's house and you had big feelings about mommy leaving and papa leaving.
[00:35:11] Remember? He got big feelings again, just thinking about it, , I was like, so I need you to hold on to
[00:35:19] Laura: that because you know what G says though, your friends, I bet he's gonna say, but I don't have to worry about that 'cause it's gonna be my house and my people be here. Yes, but your people now feel that way.
[00:35:26] I was like,
[00:35:26] Kori : but your friends might feel that way, that you know, oh my God, that they may, they may have some of those big feelings too, and we just, I want you to be prepared for the possibility that they are gonna go to their own houses for sleeping. Yes. That's called a playdate,
[00:35:43] Laura: and I recommend those instead.
[00:35:44] Kori : Yeah, and it's like, we could do an extended playdate where, like, you guys come back in the morning for pancakes. Like, I'm down for that. Oh, that's so nice. Um, I'm, that's totally fine.
[00:35:54] Laura: You're really nice. I'm like,
[00:35:56] Kori : nah, we're good.
[00:35:59] Laura: If I stayed up with late with you, I'm not getting up early with you. It's been real.
[00:36:04] It's been real. I'll leave your stuff on the porch. Oh my God. That's so funny. Good luck. Let me know how that goes. Yeah, I will. Can you do like a Captain's Log style text message to me?
[00:36:13] Kori: Captain's Log. Hour four. They're getting restless. Yes.
[00:36:19] Kori : I now have a wine IV drip. Yes. And it is, and it is flowing straight to the back of my throat.
[00:36:27] Laura : Two boys have cried. It's all right. We're all still here.
[00:36:31] Kori : I've cleaned up poop. I've cleaned up urine. I have, I have, I have blown 17 noses.
[00:36:40] Laura: I have, yeah, I've cleaned up, or we've had two, two sugar overdoses. Yep. And a crash. Three
[00:36:46] Kori : spill accidents.
[00:36:47] Laura: Oh my God.
[00:36:49] Kori : And one ax, one, uh. One toppled down. And one broken toy.
[00:36:52] One broken toy. Right, right, right. Definitely a broken toy. My God. Good luck. Good luck. Mm
[00:36:56] Laura: hmm.
[00:36:57] Kori : Mm hmm.
[00:36:58] Laura: So. Well, here's the good news. We, in the same way, kind of how you started us, right? The things that were true before Tuesday are true today. And uh, it's, it, I think two things are true at the same time. That it's going to be terrible for a lot of people, and we're going to be okay.
[00:37:20] And there's community, and if we reach out and exhibit care. going
[00:37:23] Kori : to be okay. Some people are not.
[00:37:25] Laura: I know.
[00:37:26] Kori : I know.
[00:37:27] Laura: Well, I've, I would encourage anybody listening, if you have people in your life that fall into these categories of people who may not be okay, that you reach out immediately if you haven't already.
[00:37:36] Kori : Yeah.
[00:37:37] Laura: To express care and concern and community. How can we help? How can we support? Know that you can count on us. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:37:43] Kori : Yeah. Cause it's like. The thing about it is he's not predictable and so it's like we know that he's going to do the things that he said he's going to do, but what that's going to look like, it's like you just have when, and all of that.
[00:38:01] Like you just don't have any idea.
[00:38:04] Keith: You know? I think this might be a good time for people to familiarize themselves with their state representatives, their, their congresspeople and senators, um, especially if you live in a place where you have either like moderate or progressive representation, because.
[00:38:21] We're going to be relying on, on Congress and the Senate to stop some bad things over the next four years and yeah, you, people are going to have to lean on whatever they can to try and act as a check. Um, Trump's first term, he had some more traditional voices and they essentially acted like adults in the room.
[00:38:40] That's why he ended up firing so many people because it would stop him from his like worst impulses. And I'm worried that he's not going to have many of those same people. He'll staff up differently. The people in his administration are going to be much worse and much less likely to act as adults in the room.
[00:38:57] So yeah, lean on your Congress people and senators and make sure, just do anything that you can to try and drum up some resistance to what I'm sure are going to be some absolutely bonkers policy proposals.
[00:39:13] Laura: And to that point, think about building, right? So next year in Virginia, next November, we're gonna have a gubernatorial election.
[00:39:21] We're an off year. We can elect a Democratic governor to make sure that they have veto power over whatever comes out of state legislature around reproductive rights and transgender policies and schools and all of these things, right? We've got midterms in two years now for Congress. We need to plan for that.
[00:39:39] We need to donate towards that. We need to volunteer for that. Um, we need to have conversations that are hard, especially white people with white people, to say, Hey, listen. We just gave this guy carte blanche to do whatever he wants across all of our branches of government practically. House still to be
[00:39:59] Kori : determined.
[00:39:59] Because remember that Supreme Court
[00:40:00] Laura: ruling. Yeah. Yeah. And immunity. And presidential immunity. Yes. Let's not forget about that shit. So we're going to need to build ourselves a firewall whether you think the economy isn't great or not. He's coming for your daughter. He's coming for your niece and nephew and your grandchild and all of, you know, this, he's coming for your social security check.
[00:40:18] What is your plan? So maybe he does do some great things for you. Maybe he's gonna make you happy in some regard. What is your plan for the rest of it? Because you had to overlook a lot to get to this point. So what is your plan as a stopgap and as a firewall against the rest of that shit that you just greenlit?
[00:40:35] Kori : And also in terms of long game too, because it's like you may see immediate benefits that That, that serve you, but the long term impact of those things is like you, like you have no retirement now. So, so you got that check that you wanted or those checks that you wanted, but now you have no checks after you turn 55 or 62 or 77, Oh, or the retirement age is just going to keep rising.
[00:41:00] And so you can never retire. You'll just die. You'll just basically work till you
[00:41:04] Laura: die. It's like the trading your birthright for a bowl of soup.
[00:41:08] Kori : Mm hmm. Mm hmm.
[00:41:09] Laura: Right? Is that Jacob and Esau? Oh, and let's not forget the
[00:41:12] Kori : billions of dollars that immigrants pay into our system that are no longer going to be available because he's going to be deporting those people even though they don't actually reap the benefit of any of those contributions.
[00:41:25] Laura: Mm hmm.
[00:41:25] Kori : So let's not forget about the, that, that either.
[00:41:27] Laura: Decrease in revenue and decrease in labor availability. And terror in breaking community, families and communities apart. Oh, and then tariffs.
[00:41:33] Kori : So prices are going to go up. There are going to be few, fewer resources all the way across the board because the labor is going to be down.
[00:41:40] Right? It's like, just think about just that thread. Pull the
[00:41:43] Laura : thread. Pull the thread.
[00:41:46] Keith: Plus 300 billion dollars to deport. The deportation plan could be He won't even He said he doesn't care. 300 and something billion dollars. Like, in his first administration, he blew up the deficit and left us with a xstaggering like trillions of dollars in debt.
[00:42:05] And he's gonna do it. Which again
[00:42:07] Kori : is like, how are we a superpower again if we have all of this debt? I mean, I get this is like Western thinking. Could buy a home
[00:42:15] Laura: on this debt to income ratio, could you? We sure
[00:42:17] Kori : couldn't. Mm mm. Right? I was like, I saw this meme and it was, it was the, um, the treasury, oh, hey, by the way, we are, we lost, right?
[00:42:28] And the Navy like, Oh, hey, we can't find this F 16, we can't find this fighter. Oh, since we're talking, the Pentagon, hey, trillions here. And then the IRS is like, this lady didn't pay 2. 17 in taxes five years ago. We should put her in jail. That sounds about right. The government loses, spends, whatever, trillions of dollars, no big deal.
[00:42:56] A regular person
[00:42:59] Laura: doing the best they can,
[00:43:00] Kori : doing the best they can, can't pay their medical bill from their hospital stay, and now they have nowhere to live. This is America. Anyway, so if I can survive the sleepover, I think that I'll find strategies to survive these four years. If I can survive a sleepover with five toddlers ages three to five, then I will be able to have developed.
[00:43:28] The inner strength to navigate this, the toddler that's going to be ruling the country. The hellscape. Yeah, the hellscape. No, so
[00:43:37] Laura: basically, your sleepover with five toddlers is going to feel like four years. Right. Okay, so you're doing like a all at once boot camp, toughen up, Kori. Yes. All right. Get you some calluses on those pretty little hands.
[00:43:49] Like, show me those, send me those gel manicures. Show me how pretty those hands are. They're
[00:43:53] Kori : going to be all
[00:43:53] Laura: busted up.
[00:43:53] Kori : Nope.
[00:43:55] Laura: You're going to work it raw. You're going to get it all torn off.
[00:43:58] Kori : Mm hmm.
[00:43:58] Laura: We'll be thinking about you on Friday. Mm hmm. And friends and listeners, know that you're not alone. All of your feelings are valid and normal, and reach out to people who are in your community that can support you.
[00:44:12] Think about ways, especially if you are a person with privilege, significant privilege, In lots of dimensions, think about ways that you can be supporting people who are going to be most impacted, think about non profits that are going to be doing the work, ACLU, and Trevor Project, and all these different organizations that are going to hold back Trump as best they can, and protect vulnerable populations, um.
[00:44:35] And
[00:44:35] Kori : also be thinking about how you talk to the racist ass fucking people in your own family, and begin having conversations. It doesn't have to be the whole conversation. But, like, start trying to understand their perspective, because you being able to understand why they would want somebody like this in office will help us as we are fighting for justice.
[00:44:56] Laura: Yes. Both micro and macro, right? Both micro and macro. We need a different message. What message is resonating with them that is not working broadly, that we can understand and use, not because we want power, but because we want to actually fight for their interests too? Yes. Yes. Yes.
[00:45:12] Kori : Right. And what part of their lived experience do they think is going to be improved?
[00:45:16] Were, like, were they voting for? What is the piece that they were seeing that, how, where were they seeing themselves? Yeah. In, in that campaign?
[00:45:24] Laura: What was most motivating? What was salient enough that they could overlook everything else?
[00:45:28] Kori : Yes.
[00:45:29] Laura: To pick this shit.
[00:45:30] Kori : Yes, and use that as the entry point, that listening for understanding and then keep expanding the conversation, keep expanding the conversation.
[00:45:42] But listen for understand, not attacking, not blaming, not shaming, listening to try to get it or at least be able to see.
[00:45:53] Laura: Because we need to make the world more just.
[00:45:55] Kori : Yeah.
[00:45:56] Laura: We gotta fix this shit. And that requires No one's coming to save us. No one's coming to save
[00:45:59] Kori : us. It's us. It's us. And that means that we have to understand the people who Who's values and beliefs don't always align with ours.
[00:46:08] We need to be able to understand and connect with those people. Because I think truly at the end of the day, most people want to have a life that they can live with their families, that's in dignity, that is, you know, there are a few things that we can all share. And so why don't we kind of identify those and hone in on those things and not all of the various ways in which.
[00:46:36] We move differently anyway, it's my last five cents.
[00:46:43] Laura: I'll take it. I'll take that nickel. Thank you. Thinking about you all in blue states and red states and red bubbles and blue bubbles and everywhere in between. Um, because it's a hard, it's, it's, it's admittedly a hard week. What, what, what? Also,
[00:46:59] Kori : don't forget to check in on the children.
[00:47:02] Hmm. Children are feeling this in their own ways. 9 They live in houses with people who have opinions about things regardless of what those opinions are and they hear them and they embody them and so they may be at school getting into disagreements with people because the beliefs within their household around the election are different.
[00:47:26] So be checking in on the children. There are already. Kids getting racist tweets talking about they should be picking cotton and all this kind of stuff like be Checking in on all of the children and make sure that they feel safe that they feel confident in whatever it is that they're believing or espousing to be able to have a conversation and that they know how to opt out of some of the conversations if they need to And validate their feelings.
[00:47:54] Laura: And validate
[00:47:55] Kori : their feelings. Yeah.
[00:47:56] Laura: This is not all we wanted or this is scaring and you are safe and I've got you.
[00:48:01] Kori : Yeah.
[00:48:01] Laura: Yeah. So, yeah. Thank you. Great reminder. That was more than a nickel's worth. I'll take that too.
[00:48:07] Kori : Thank you all for listening to Pushing Past Polite on this heavier kind of day, um, where we talk about what matters and we make the world more just.
[00:48:16] I'm Kori.
[00:48:17] Laura: I'm Laura. Thanks so much. Be the light where you are. Thank you.
[00:48:22] Keith: Bye everybody. See ya. I'm going to go start drinking. What is it? It's like, uh, 11. 30. Hey, it's almost noon. Airport
[00:48:30] Laura: rules. It's almost noon? It was Amber Rules there for a couple of days, like, listen, just do what you gotta do, survive.
[00:48:35] Beer before nine. I
[00:48:36] Kori : feel like Daniel's out there making cocktails now.
[00:48:40] Laura: I wish I were close enough to
[00:48:41] Kori : share one with you.
[00:48:43]Laura: He's getting ready for Friday. He's getting ready for the sleepover. Yeah, man. Thanks so much for listening to Pushing Past Polite. We're here for you. Be here for other people and we'll talk to you soon.
Kori: Thanks for listening to Pushing Past Polite. We encourage you to go deeper in your trusted spaces and find new space for good conversation.
Laura: You'll find episodes, transcripts, and lots of other goodies at our website, pushingpastpolitepodcast.com. You can also connect with us on Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok at Pushing Past Polite.
Kori: Pushing Past Polite is an independent podcast with Kori and Laura from Just Educators.
Laura: Our cover art was designed by Rachel Welsh De Iga of De Iga Design, and our audio is produced by Keith at Headset Media. Until next time, don't get stuck talking about the weather. Push past polite.
Kori: See you next time.
Little Dude: Bye bye.
Laura: Jay, you did perfect!
